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Twisted Titles!
Last updated September 11th, 2000
Welcome to the Twisted Titles page. The concept for this page comes from Cal Monthly, UC Berkeley's monthly magazine for students and alumni.
Here's how it works: Take a title (movie, book, TV show, occupation, etc) or a popular phrase, change one or two letters (no more!), and write a new subline for it. I've posted a few from Cal Monthly and one of my own to help you get started.
To contribute your Twisted Titles to this page, send me an e-mail with "Twisted Titles" as your subject. Be sure to include your name and e-mail address, and please also provide the original title you derived your Twisted Title from so I can check its validity. Please keep it clean and sane, but have fun and be creative!
NOTE: As of May '99, new entries are being added to the TOP of the list, rather than the bottom. Enjoy!
(9/11/01) New Submissions
By Jo Kellner, 9/11/01:
Dock Star
Longshoreman makes it big in the music industry
Rust Hour
When traffic is REALLY bad
American Pig
Babe finds a girlfriend
By Dorsola, 9/11/01:
Gump in Sixty Seconds
Momma always said, keep it brief...
The Curse of the Fake Scorpion
I knew I shouldn't have gotten the plastic one!
Piss Off the Dragon
Another Reality-TV show that didn't quite make it.
Slouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon
Eh, I'll fight you after my break.
By Dorsola, 12/1/00:
Parking Is Such Sweet Sorrow
Especially in San Francisco!
Unfreakable
The story of someone who witnessed a train wreck and ... didn't freak.
The Sith Day
Arnie co-stars as Darth Maul's clone.
The Sith Sense
Anakin discovers he can talk to people who don't know they're Jedis yet.
By Jo Kellner, 12/1/00:
X-Hen
The Bionic Chicken Strikes Again
The Hollow Fan
Con-goer spends everything in dealer's room, seen begging outside coffee shop
Level 99
This series is really in the ratings basement
Stuffy the Vampire Slayer
Meet the new slayer: Teddy Ruxpin
Dark Angle
Ever wonder what goes on in those shadowy corners?
Mysterious Wars
What ARE they fighting about, anyway?
New submissions by Jo Kellner, 10/31/99:
The Dummy
Village idiot gets entombed by mistake
The Mommy
Pharoah's mother-in-law moves in.
Cruel Inventions
S&M comes to the US Patent Office
Retarding Henry
Being a lawyer can have unfortunate side-effects.
Earthquack
"Duck and Cover" takes on a whole new meaning.
Field of Streams
Ball game called on account of rain.
Mystery Hen
Henny Penny joins the super squad
The Lunchback of Notre Dame
New defensive position for "Refrigerator" Perry
The Jungle Boot
Mowgli's first pair of shoes.
The Hatchback of Notre Dame
The official mascot of the automotive department.
- Dorsola, 10/31/99.
Sabrina Onlife
The cutest skunk on the 'Net takes up philosophy.
- Raymond Becker (9/25/99)
Halloween I2O
New specification strikes fear into hardware developers.
- Jo Kellner (4/7/99)
Limply Irresistable
Lack of spine leads to box office flop.
- Jo Kellner (4/7/99)
What Streams May Come
Flood control in the Afterlife.
- Jo Kellner (4/7/99)
Fakespeare
Will the real Bard please stand up?
- Jo Kellner (4/7/99)
Raving Private Ryan
After the rescue, the hero is committed.
- Jo Kellner (4/7/99)
Glueless
Panic strikes Office Depot
- Jo Kellner, 02/26/99.
Sleetless in Seattle
Meteorologists ponder sudden shift in winter weather.
- Jo Kellner, 02/26/99.
You've Got Hail!
AOL's version of a stormy forecast.
- Dorsola, 03/02/99.
Witless For the Prosecution
Marcia calls Forrest to the stand.
- Sue McAllister, class of 1948, UC Berkeley.
It is better to jive than to receive
Deion Sanders talks philosophy with Jerry Rice.
- Joe Traynor, class of 1957, UC Berkeley.
The Man without a Fact
Ripley's unsuccessful brother.
- Jerald Terry, class of 1959, UC Berkeley.
The Laming of the Shrew
Gardener gives up on poison, resorts to traps.
- Art Poulin, class of 1948, UC Berkeley.
Facial Slur
"Your nose is bigger than New Jersey!"
- Joe Traynor, class of 1957, UC Berkeley.
Jehovah's Fitness
Exercising 1st Amendment rights door-to-door.
- Stan Tsu, class of 1984, UC Berkeley.
Exploding America
A guided tour of our country's best nuclear stockpiles.
- Dorsola.
The Empire Strikes Bach
Storm troopers get tired of classical music, go nuts.
- Dorsola, 05/06/98.
The Graphs of Wrath
The logarithmic ones are especially bad.
- Dorsola, 05/06/98.
Hannah and Her Misters
A woman goes wild at Macy's perfume counter.
- Brenda Holloway, 05/12/98.
A Sale of Two Cities
St. Paul and Minneapolis are bought by Japanese investors.
- Brenda Holloway, 05/12/98.
Night of the Living Head
A tale of terror set aboard a submarine.
- Brenda Holloway, 05/12/98.
First Lives Club
Kittens dodging traffic.
- Brenda Holloway, 05/12/98.
The Silence of the Lamps
All the genies have gone on strike.
- Dorsola, 05/12/98.
Descent II: Counterstripe
Rogue bots redo the paint jobs on all of the PTMC's equipment.
- Cheetah, 06/09/98.
Jurassic Pork
Today's special: T-REX sandwich, fries and a large drink - $3.99
- Cheetah, 06/09/98.
Codzilla
The terror of the deep comes to destroy Atlantis once again.
- Cheetah, 06/09/98.
King Pong
Quick! Feed it quarters so it'll stay off the Empire State Building!!
- Cheetah, 06/09/98.
Dunces With Wolves
Prairie-land school comes up with unique way to disclipine unruly children.
- Dorsola, 06/10/98.
It's a Wonderful Lift
Fame and fortune come to the owners of a small ski resort.
- Dorsola, 06/12/98.
The Good Sin
The lesser of two evils.
- Dorsola, 06/12/98.
Who Flamed Roger Rabbit
Toon discovers life isn't much different on the Internet.
- Dorsola, 06/12/98.
The Band That Rocks the Cradle
Local group specializing in heavy-metal lullabies.
- Dorsola, 06/18/98.
The Peacefaker
Major politician will do anything to win the election.
- SheDevil, 07/05/98.
The Rocky Horror Picture Shop
Where you can save BIG on Frankenfurter portraits today!
- Dorsola, 07/06/98.
Pocahonkas
Translates roughly to "Beep beep - Outta my way!"
- Dorsola, 07/06/98.
Stream 2
Second in a series of thrilling trout fishing documentaries
- Dennis LeForce, 09/16/98.
